Ode For Billy L. Back when I was in my teens, Trucking eggs to New Orleans, Eating rice and good red beans, I had a friend whose name was Wayne. To all who knew us it was plain, That one of us was less than sane. We raced my father's Studebaker, Looking sleek ... it was a faker; Everyone we raced could take her. At seventeen made a decision; Underwent a circumcision, Too late now for a revision. In my back yard upon the ground, We built a pond of bricks we found. Man, you should have heard the sound, Of my stepmother when she saw, What we had built without a flaw, I tell you it dropped her jaw. We painted it a brilliant blue, We thought was stunning; wouldn't you? For Miss Lorraine it would not do. We did it anyway, you see, Followed the plan we thought would be, A lot of harmless fun and glee. Then we put some water in, Where previously none had been. Man, you should have seen us grin. We let it sit about a week, Day by day taking a peek. Making sure it didn't leak. Then baby alligators came. They were small, and almost tame. But as they grew, things weren't the same. They quickly got to two feet long, With sharpened teeth and legs so strong, My dad said, "Son, I've rung the gong. Your game is up. My wife can't sleep, Knowing that your pets might leap, Out of your pond and maybe creep, Into the house and bite her toe. You want to keep them, this I know, But she says they will have to go." I told him they would do no harm, But he did not enjoy their charm. They now live at the gator farm. We did some other stuff, you know, Involving Lorraine's Dynaflow, But now I think it best I go, Before I tell you too much more, And end up making someone sore, Enough to even up the score. copyright ©2011 Wayne Hepburn - All Rights Reserved